Did you just say that?

A couple of days ago on Pintrest I came across a picture that gave a little exercise that would help you think before you speak. I don't know about you but my brain-to-mouth filter is frequently out of order and unfortunately a lot of times, what comes up, comes out. In this past 4 year relationship that I've grown with Christ one of the biggest lessons I had to learn was how to bridle my tongue. When I first came to the Gathering (my super awesome college ministry led by none other than Tim 'PT' Johnson)  as a freshman I had a really nasty attitude. I didn't know how to be nice or how to give a compliment. My only objective was to say something rude and demeaning to you before you had the chance to say something hurtful to me. The root of the issue was plain to see: INSECURITY. I was not confident in the person that God made me to be so therefore I felt everyone was out to hurt me and as a result I equipped myself with a shield of attitude and vulgarity. I was determined to hurt you so bad that you would never have a chance to hurt me. As I started to grow in Christ, He revealed to me my funky attitude and He showed me how it had an affect on the way people dealt and interacted with me. He showed me that a lot of people didn't like me because I had such a jacked up attitude, the rudeness was getting me nowhere. So I say that to say this, the things that you say can have an impact on the entire world around you. James 3 tells us that the tongue is a tiny organ that can control the whole body just as a tiny spark can cause a forest fire! Proverbs 18 tells us that death & life are in the power of the tongue. This should show us the importance of bridling our tongues but if that doesn't do it for you let me keep going. Proverbs 21:23 "Whoever keeps his mouth and tongue keeps himself out of danger. Ephesians 4: 29 "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear."  James 1:26 "If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless." Matthew 15:11  “Hear and understand:it is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.” So as you can see, the bible has a lot to say on the importance of taming the tongue. I'd like to share this little exercise with you so hopefully the next time you're about to open your mouth and speak recklessly, you'll T-H-I-N-K before you speak. 

Ask yourself each of the following questions

T-Is it true? Often times we will speculates, exaggerate or just flat out lie, but what does that say about our integrity. Our validity? Will people still consider us a trustworthy source or will they dismiss anything else we ever tell them. If something is not true it simply shouldn't be stated

H- Is it helpful? I know that I am the queen of piping with useless information that is providing assistance to absolutely no one.If you add your 2 cents will it help come up with a dollar or is it simply 2 cents that can't be used for anything.  If you don't have anything to state that is helpful to the situation or will help provide a solution, it may be appropriate to keep it to yourself.

I-Is it inspiring? Once again I have to correct admit that I'm severely guilty of this. My niece constantly calls me a dream-crusher because I'm quick to tell her that she sounds horrible when she sings and that she does not have a future in the music industry. Am I telling the truth? Very likely. Did I inspire her and tell her that she can do anything under the Son that is in the will of God? Not at all. People have the world that is there to disgrace them, they don't need it in the body of believers as well. If you can't be encouraging & inspiring then it may be appropriate once again to keep it to yourself.

N- Is it necessary? Have you ever met someone who just always had something unnecessary to say, especially when no one asked them? They could never let the conversation rest until they took it way too far and stated everything that they felt was necessary for the conversation to continue. I'm sure everyone has met a person like that, and if you haven't you very well may be that person. Once again if you're not apart of the solution then you are part of the problem. Make sure that all your input is needed and welcomed.

K- Is it kind? I'll be the first to admit that I struggle in this department. It is honestly easier for me to fire off an insult than to say something nice. I seriously have to be intentional with almost every compliment or encouraging word that I give. That doesn't mean I'm being fake with my compliments, they are truly sincere but its honestly not in my natural inclination to give a compliment. It took someone to sit me down one day and tell me that what I considered jokes were actually hurting their feelings and for once it would be nice to receive a compliment. That was over 2 years ago and I still remember it like it was yesterday. If you can't find anything kind and gracious to say then be quiet.

I'd like to encourage you today to be thoughtful with the words that you speak. You can either build someone up to the highest mountain, or you can drown them in the lowest valley all at the flick of a tongue.

(-gracefully, Channing]